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Lately, I have been hearing the phrase, “This wasn’t serving me." It comes up in conversations about relationships, jobs, lifestyles--- almost anything. There are many things that aren't serving us in life. Asking ourselves, “Is this serving me?” can help us to reflect on our lives. Reflecting from the right perspective can help us change our lives for the better. But what if we took it a step further? What would it look like if, instead, we asked ourselves, “Is this serving God?” Have you ever wondered if your situation is about more than just you? Maybe God has placed you there for a reason you can't see yet. What if you are still at the same job you don't enjoy because one of your coworkers needs to see what it looks like to walk with Jesus. What if God keeps asking you to invest in that friendship because your friend is going through something hard, and she needs to see that God still cares and is bringing people to her during the journey? Sometimes, it isn’t about us. There will be times in our lives when we do something for someone else, and it has nothing to do with our own situation. Instead, it has everything to do with what God is doing. We can be in a situations where it seems like it is not serving us. If we stop and look at things from a Godly perspective, we might just see that God is working for us and working for others. Now, don’t get me wrong, not every scenario is one where God wants us to stay where we are. Sometimes, we will be in a circumstance that God no longer wants us to be in. There will also be times when life feels good as it is, and God can call us to give something "good" up. Your job may be taking time away from your family. Your lifestyle might be holding you back from God's calling on your life, or your hobbies could be leading you astray. So how do we know if these things in our life are serving us or God? We PRAY and ask God to give us wisdom and discernment to know what truly serves His kingdom. We CHECK to see if it aligns with God’s word. We ASK: Does it bring me closer to God or farther away? Proverbs 3:5-6 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all yours ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." Many things in our life seem good, and sometimes they might seem not so good. That doesn't mean that they aren't part of God's plan. Trust that He knows what's best, even when it is hard to see. I challenge you this week to look about the situation that you feel isn't serving you and ask God if it is serving Him instead.

Perfect was something I strived to be when I was little. I truly believed that the more perfect I was, the more loved I would be. This mentality of perfection actually led me to struggle in relationships with others. I believed that I had to get everything right in the things that I said and did for those around me to love me. It wasn't until a few years ago that I realized how flawed this thinking was. There are two major problems with this mindset. 1. I will never be perfect and 2. My focus was on being perfect for those around me 2. My focus was on being perfect for those around me, a.k.a. people-pleasing, not focused on God’s love for me and what He says about me. aka people pleasing, not focused on God’s love for me and what he says about me. Many of us still live with the belief that have to be perfect to be loved, successful, important. But we need to ask ourselves: who are we trying to be perfect for - God or people? If it is for people then we are going to exhaust ourselves and sacrifice the quality of our lives and our family’s lives. We will chase the perfect life that we see on someone’s highlight reel or compare ourselves to the family across the street, our coworker, or even fellow believers. II have to admit, my expectations of perfection weren't rooted in God's expectations for me. My perfectionism was rooted in my desire to be loved by others. It took me years to realize this. Through conversations with others, I came to understand that my adult perfectionism stemmed from expectations I had set for myself, not anyone else. I had to confront the fact that the expectations that I believed in for so long were not the same as God's expectations for me. If we are trying to be perfect for God then we will never be successful. We have to realize we can never reach perfection. It is unattainable for us. The good news is that I don't need to be perfect. As a believer, I know that Jesus died on the cross for our sins. When he died, we were gifted with righteousness. This means when we believe in Jesus, God already sees us as righteous. We don’t have to push ourselves to our breaking point to achieve perfection. Jesus already achieved perfection for us. There is such a reward and peace in knowing that God loves us even though we aren’t perfect. He sees us as He sees his own son, Jesus, who was perfect. As a recovering perfectionist, I want to focus more on the quality of my relationships with God, my family, and my friends. I want my kids to know that they are loved, especially when they don't get everything right. Whenever you feel like you have to be perfect and it's weighing on you, remember this; God sees you striving to be the best person you can be, God knows your heart and He loves you. You don't have to keep being perfect because the perfect sacrifice was already made for YOU!

I want you to close your eyes and think about the last time you felt peace. Where were you? What were you doing? What about that moment made you feel at peace? I started thinking about this one day when I was standing outside, walking my dog. I listened to the birds sing and watched them fly from tree to tree. My dog chased a grasshopper as the sun was shining through the trees. That moment felt incredibly peaceful. As I stood there, I started to think about my daily habits and priorities. I realized that I didn't have the peace I was longing for because I didn’t actively pursue it. My day are filled with all the daily responsibilities of being a mother, wife, friend, volunteer and I forget to stop and find that moment of tranquility. I can also get distracted by messages, emails, and social media.  I've unintentionally prioritized these things over my connection time with God. As good as some of these things in my life are, they can actually take away my time to connect with God and, ultimately, some of my peace. So, where do I feel the most peace? I realized that my most peaceful moments are when I am outside connecting with nature, when I am in God's word, out for a walk, or just observing His creation. It is in these places that I am in awe of who God is. Why? This is where I see God’s creativity in the world around me. Sometimes, it feels as though He creates a special painting in the sky each day to share with me. My heart longs for more of it. Beauty in Nature I believe we can all find peace if we intentionally seek it. Maybe you find that peace when you are washing the dishes as you look out your kitchen window where golden sunlight filtered through the trees. Perhaps it is in the car sitting by yourself before moving onto the next thing. It could be during your tea (or coffee) time with God. Or maybe it is just lying in the grass with your eyes closed. Wherever you feel that peace, seek it more. That peace comes from God, connecting us with Him. We honestly need more of it in this world. I find that when I create that space to connect with God, I don't just create peace for myself, but I am in a better place to handle the moments of everyday life. I am more patient and kind which brings more peace to my home. My whole family dynamic can change just by bringing more of God into my day. Take a moment today to seek peace. Step outside, breathe deeply, and connect with God. It is truly worth it! "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives." -John 14:27

Look Up Last year I went to a wedding in Georgia. I was solo on this trip and so I decided to take a hike at a nearby mountain. Being out in nature is one of the places I can connect with God. It feels as though all the distractions of the world fade away. As I was walking, I was praying and asking God for guidance in my life. As much as I love taking walks, I am a little clumsy and can trip pretty easily. While walking on the trail, I started to get to some of the rockier areas where you really need to watch your step. I started looking down at my feet as they navigated the rocks and dirt beneath them. I heard the Holy Spirit say, “Look up.” I looked up and when I did, I realized the long path was right ahead of me. If I just looked straight ahead. I could see what was coming. I didn't need to look down. I continued walking, focusing on the path ahead, I heard a slight noise to my right. Suddenly, beautiful deer began crossing in front of me. It was an amazing sight! The deer were unaware of my presence and continued their journey. I could’ve easily missed the deer because I was so focused on not stumbling on the rocks and falling.   I would like to say that I looked up the rest of my hike, but that's just not true. Shortly after this area, I came to another rocky area and I was focusing on the rocks right in front of my feet. I ended up falling and cutting my hand on one of the jagged rocks. Yeah, I would share the picture, but I'll spare you. At that moment, I heard that subtle reminder to, “look up.” That’s when I was like okay God, I get it. I am going to lift my eyes. So many times we miss what God has for us because our attention is focused on the wrong thing. In this case my eyes were focused on the rocks, not the path ahead. This theme of look up has been replaying in my life over the past year. I will hear the Holy Spirit whisper, “look up” at different moments in my life. I might be looking down at my phone, reading a book, or some other task that has my attention. Do you know what I miss by lifting my eyes? I don’t miss out on anything that had my attention a moment ago. I actually gain the opportunity to see something that God wants to show me. When I lift my eyes, I see my kids playing together nicely. I see the birds that have come to say hello in my yard. I see my husband playing with our boys. I see my friend bringing flowers to celebrate another friend's birthday. I see the man returning my cart for me at the store, I see the mom who is crying and overwhelmed. When I look up, I get to see what God has chosen to share with me in that moment and on that day. He has gone before us and set our day.  Deuteronomy 31:8 says, “The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” When we focus too much on the distractions, we miss the beautiful moments God has created for us. This isn’t just the little moments. If we aren’t careful, we can miss the evidence of God working in our lives in BIG ways too. Like when people come to help us during a difficult season or when that job opportunity comes at just the right time. We might miss the blessing that God has orchestrated these events in our life to be a blessing to us during that exact time.  When we are distracted, we can also miss the moments God has created for us to be the vessel to work in others' lives. When we are distracted, we might miss the person who was just a little short on cash to pay the grocery bill, or the lady whose battery died and needs help jumping off her battery. Looking up creates the space for God to use us for His glory. Honestly, I miss way more of these opportunities than I would like. Maybe you are like me and have missed some of these opportunities too. The good news is God is gracious and He never gives up on us. Each day is full of new ways to see God. I want to encourage you as you go throughout your day, look up and see what God has to show you.

Why Three 4 Tea? Welcome to Three 4 Tea! If you are wondering why Three 4 Tea, let me explain. Well, something you probably already guessed about me is that I am a tea drinker. Yes, I am one of the few people, or at least it seems that way, that does not drink coffee. Did I grow up in England? Nope, I grew up in the South where the tea is sweeter than your grandma's chocolate cake. As much as I love the smell of coffee, my taste buds do not agree. So, my friends, tea it is for me. But don't worry, I don't mind if you love coffee. I won't even mind if you are drinking a cup while reading this right now. I make my tea and sit down for my daily Bible reading time. I love imagining Jesus sitting right beside me drinking a hot cup of tea we we go through the Word of God together. In fact, I like to imagine Him with me throughout whatever I am doing; whether it be sitting in carline, making meals, or even helping me referee the constant wrestling matches between my boys and dogs. So, it seems fitting that he would be here for this writing as well. While Jesus is here for tea (or coffee) with me, so are you, sweet reader. Together, we make three for tea. Here, I will share my experiences with parenting, my faith, and other thoughts that come to mind. So next time, get your cup of tea, coffee, or whatever your favorite beverage is and join me.